Things I Think I Thought....unless I was Incepted of course

The following is a list of things that I have thought over the last couple of days.  I have a strong tendency to let my mind wander and am often surprised by where it ends up.  Even more so, I find that many things are stranger and more curious than people think as most do not "waste" their time with such thoughts.  I hope to make this a recurring post as I have a fun time recording, analyzing and dissecting my more random thoughts.  So here is hopefully the first of many "Things I Think I Thought...unless I was Incepted of course".

• I think it is weird how certain foods can have a breakfast side to them as well.  I had an early morning quesadilla the other day and the only thing that kept it from being a breakfast wrap was the addition of eggs.  I dont know who is in charge of these things but it seems like wraps were able to make the leap to the breakfast game probably boxing out pita in the process.  For that matter why cant I just have a legitimate breakfast sandwich eh?  It has to be a wrap or on an english muffin, why cant I just have an egg sandwich on some whole wheat?
• I think that, on average, a woman's calves are better than the average man's; I think that is just an easily observable fact.  I do have an opinion as to the reason for this though, I think it is purely because of high heels.  I think that if I were to walk around on my toes from time to time (or everyday as I have heard happens) my calves would get a great workout and would probably look great as a result.  I'm going to start wearing 20lb watches on both hands so my shoulders get huge and I can get physical benefits from outerwear.
• I think hippos are just one of the coolest animals ever.  Look them up and read about them because their short list of amazing attributes include: amphibious speech and hearing, incredible speed, ability to produce their own sunscreen, a short temper, giant toothbrushes and the ability to eat people.  Not to mention that they are great dancers apparently.

 

• I don't know what the point of buying a travel mug is, they keep drinks too hot.  The one I have keeps tea too hot to drink for about three hours which has officially become dangerous.  If I am driving and need a caffeine injection so I don't Tokyo Drift off the road, it comes with the price of a stiff burn on the tongue (quite the wake up as well).  I'm not complaining, I'm just saying that sometimes I want some tea and by the time it is cool enough to drink I've had to wait so long I'm not sure if I want it anymore.
• I think the word "cosmos" is a strange and confusing word.  I don't know if it is plural or not, if it is plural then what the hell is a "cosmo"?  I understand it is a drink but that just raises further questions.  If the only difference between the vastness in space and a sweet martini is an "s" the English language is just playing with fire.  What happens where someone orders multiple cosmos eh?  Are we talking about multiple pockets of space or are we just getting drunk?  What is up with these words?
• I think that jaws are weird.  They move in strange ways, they are a large part of peoples face and yet never considered as a favorite attribute, I dont think they have anything to do with a smile but it seems like they probably should and I dont know if you can sprain a jaw or not.  Weird stuff.
• I think that Cinco De Mayo is a very underrated holiday.  I mean, we are in an age where many people feel strongly that St. Patrick's Day should be a national holiday across the world.  You think people would even further support a day that is has drinking along with straw hats and limes.  Why doesn't Corona start a campaign to make it a national holiday?  That sounds like a million dollar idea right there.
• Sex is English's version of the Inuit's (is Eskimo offensive?  It feels like it might be) snow.  Let me explain, everyone talks about how the Inuit have like 20 different words for snow and English is a vague language because we just have snow.  Firstly I don't agree because there is sleet and hail and slush and many others to go along with a bunch of different adjectives and modifiers.  The point of this though is that English, more specifically colloquial slang, has taken an Inuit approach with the word sex.  There are so many different words and ways to describe it that if you cant come up with 10 solid words right off the bat you just aren't trying.  To top it off almost anything sounds like it can have a strong sexual reference; for example, put anything in air quotes and it becomes sexual ("Reading a book", "Juicing some lemons", "Getting some exercise"). 
• Pears, the fruit, are a more popular way of describing objects that are oblong than the geometrical term oblong.  I think that is weird because I would never describe other things without using the associated geometrical term.  My monitor is not "book shaped" or "like a pizza box" it is just square; baseballs aren't "orange shaped" they are just round or a sphere.  I guess I might use the term "ball" more than I say sphere but I definitely say round more than the geometrically correct sphere.  The point is that things that are "pear shaped" are shaped like a pear and not oblong.
• I think it is strange how the days of the week have a certain feelings.  I dont know why it is like that but I think that it has something to do with sleeping cycles.  If you know what day it is I think that your body links the days according to how much you sleep.  Right now I am working 7 days a week so what day it is doesnt matter to me at all, yet the days still have a feeling to me.  I consistently have the days wrong because my sleeping cycle is all out of sorts.  That is my theory at least, I dont know if it is right but it is weird to say the least.

Thinking about things...What's up with that?